Best Man/Dot to Dot

by Danielle N. Hall

5/27/2019

It is human nature for us to give advice (whether solicited or not), but not take heed to our own words. We encourage others, but forget to be our own cheerleader when necessary. I decided to take a little bit of a different approach this year.

While I don’t necessarily feel out of sorts physically, I thought it would be a good idea to get checked out: it had been a few years since I had my last physical. At that time I’d been diagnosed with a Vitamin D deficiency which wasn’t surprising since I don’t consume dairy products based on lactose intolerance which I developed in my adult life. Additionally, because I am challenged with vertigo, I avoid the sun (especially since heat is a trigger). Unfortunately, sunlight encourages production of Vitamin D, so I had to resort to Vitamin D supplements. Anyway, I was overdue for a physical since a few years had passed and I decided to take care of business. I scheduled my appointment, showed up, and went through the process. They attempted to draw blood for routine testing, but had difficulty doing so. They referred me to an outside lab and I scheduled my appointment for the next morning.

On the morning of October 25, 2018, I hosted my daily inspirational call which takes place at 7:30am EST and then I proceeded to take care of my medical business. The blood was drawn, I went on my merry way and I picked up my phone to call my mom. I realized it was not quite 8:30 and that she would not have been at work yet. I said that I’d give her a little less than 10 minutes and I’d reach out. Well, she beat me to the punch. She wasn’t just calling to say good morning, though. She realized she left her house keys on her couch at home and she asked if I would go by her home to pick them up and get them to her. I did not hesitate, but I thought about it once I pulled up and it really didn’t make sense for me to do that. I could’ve just picked her up from work when she got off and let her use my keys to get in her home. Nevertheless, she made a simple request and it didn’t hurt. Besides, I was already there.

I went inside. All of the lights were off and it was an unusual stillness. I observed the keys, but decided to go to the bedroom. I decided to sit on my dad’s side of the bed: something I had not done since his transition on December 20, 2017. I sat and I thought about how much I missed him. I had a very tearful moment…but it was a much needed moment to sit still and connect. I hadn’t allowed myself to truly grieve, so this moment was treasured. I looked up at their dresser and I noticed the teddy bear that my cousin had bought for him during one of his hospital stays in his last year. It took me back to the worshipful moments we would have in his hospital room. Fortunately, I have a few captured on video. I also noticed a bottle of cologne…well a few. Dad loved his fragrances and he loved to mix them up when he wore them. He really didn’t care about any particular designer, he just liked his fragrances. I must admit that he passed down the fragrance loving trait to at least this baby girl. I digress. One bottle stood out in particular and I decided to take a picture of it.

It made me cry more. Dad wasn’t perfect…no one is, but I honor him and I appreciate him for being a great man! There are so many memories and moments to behold and I’m grateful for each of them. I truly appreciated the moment I was having at that time even though, he was not physically present. I did sense his presence nonetheless. I got myself together and walked out to the living room to get the keys mom asked me to get. My cell phone rang and after I answered, the caller asked if I was ok because she was riding in her car and my name just popped up and she thought she’d check on me. This was no ordinary caller, but this caller was someone who had also recently experienced the transition of her father and, fortunately, she happened to be in a good place on this day. She encouraged me and I cried some more. As a matter of fact I am now typing through tears remembering that moment. That call was timely and so was the visit to my parents’ home.

What I know about God is that He is the master orchestrator. He guides our steps, but it’s up to us to take them. If I had not chosen to get the physical, if they had not failed to draw blood at the doctor’s office, if I had not been at the lab the next morning…then I would not have been in position to honor mom’s request to get the keys she left at home and ULTIMATELY I would not have had the much needed moment I had reflecting on dad’s side of the bed. EACH dot connected and then God showed just how much He cares by sending that on time phone call. He cares about even the little details in our lives and He is nearer to us than we often acknowledge. That moment was one I won’t forget. It was so much to process and I actually originally started writing this blogpost November last year. Then I stopped and resumed in December last year and I kept getting stuck. I decided today would be a great day to finish what I started. It’s Memorial Day and in loving memory and honor of my father, who served this country, I decided to write this post. It was originally entitled Dot to Dot, but I had to pay tribute to my dad…my “Best Man”: the one who served both his country and his family.